Any button that says Squeeze on it..
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really needs to squish when pressed. I’m just sayin’. (button shamelessly stolen from [SuprGlu][1])
[1]:http://suprglu.com/
Any button that says Squeeze on it..
![]()
really needs to squish when pressed. I’m just sayin’. (button shamelessly stolen from [SuprGlu][1])
[1]:http://suprglu.com/
I’m grossly oversimplifying when I say that there exists two types of people who want to change the world: those who seek to create change through direct and confrontational methods and those who seek change by creating environments that embody those changes. I don’t see a problem with either method; in fact, back when I was at Hamilton College, a friend of mine explained the loud and brash methods of the school’s Gay-Lesbian-Trans Student Association: sometimes people don’t even hear you unless you stand right there and shout in their faces. Maybe they purposefully ignore issues until they can’t any more, or perhaps they’re just unaware of the problems going on around them, but it takes breaking down the door before such people listen.
In other cases, inspirational communities, including Buddhist sitting groups, yoga studios and ashrams, true spiritual gatherings of any religious background, public service activities, work by _attracting_ people whose hearts and minds yearn for the sort of growth these environments provide. These communities build strength by supporting the people who want certain change in the world, and their philosophy bases not upon conversion through forced awareness but growth through experience.
To the first group the second often seem like a bunch of wishy-washy liberals. And to the second the first come off as brash, rude and inappropriate. That’s a little of what’s happened at Zaadz as some of the more anarchy-oriented members have fled the corporatizing of Tribe and sought refuge. But Zaadz, [by its own admission][tou], is a community of inspiration, a community of evolution, not a community of revolution.
The danger in a community of outspoken individuals lies in its tendency to strengthen a sense of duality - an us vs. them distinction - and cause backlash against its ideas and tactics; in a community of seekers, homogeneity presents the greater problem… communities of this type often solidify their own beliefs and wall themselves against those who do not share them. And - unfortunately - each sees the dangerous tendencies in the other all too clearly and can barely suppress their desires to challenge them. On the other hand, as long we remain vigilant against our own weaknesses and tendencies, and we remain open to constructive criticism and suggestions, both types of communities remain vital and powerful agents for change.
[tou]:http://www.zaadz.com/terms_of_use
The truth about changing the world is that both groups serve an important purpose… the loud, the brash, the rebels, they shock a complacent world into awareness. But nobody wants to be yelled at constantly, and that’s where such activism falls apart. It needs to be backed by communities of understanding, communities that support the external changes wrought by activism by providing an environment of learning, support and understanding. These are not the front lines where the casualties occur; these instead are the places that the change we want to see in the world is created, nurtured, renewed.
And just as some who are brought into awareness by the rebellious join the factions of the seekers, others find the path of controversy and confrontation through their experience as seekers. Both groups feed and support each other, even though they frequently disagree over tactics and behavior.
Just as we intend yoga studios to be places of practice and expect certain types of behavior and respect from those who take part in those gatherings, could any sufficiently radical group be expected to embrace a member who flouted their beliefs (for example, a staunch religious Republican who believes the President can wiretap and censor whatever and whenever he wishes, joining the Impeach Bush campaign and loudly, frequently, and without respectfulness, espousing his own ideas during their meetings)? No!
I’m not saying we shouldn’t make an effort to understand the reason and logic of those who oppose us in our quest for change.. we certainly should. And we certainly should listen to those who want to share their ideas for more effective change. But there are times and places for such discourse and dialogue, and by definition you don’t bring a rotting dead rabbit to your yoga class, no matter what your personal beliefs might be. (Unless, of course, the community asks you to do so, perhaps for a meditation on death!)
So there are a few people who have come to Zaadz with the idea that they can yank open minds whether they want to be torn open or not and then find that the leaders of the Zaadz community don’t appreciate such tactics. Suddenly our collective focus is not on the change we want to create in the world but on the egos involved in the current situation.
The reality of the situation is that radical communities and seeker communities generally require different playgrounds based on the understanding that certain people will move freely among them and that ultimately we all seek to create change in the world; in the arenas where we agree, we can be supportive to each other - as the outspoken open people’s eyes and the seekers nourish people’s souls.
A couple weeks ago at dinner - in the middle of sharing his vision for Zaadz - [Brian][b] asked me to tell him my ultimate goals.
That’s always been a hard question for me. I could never come up with a set of traditionally important goals - such as ‘earn a living and give lots of money to charity’ or ’start an incredible business providing tools to help people improve their lives.’ Some of those have crossed my mind, but none seemed to really _fit_… none seemed so important that I could call them an **ultimate** goal.
And then [someone from the UK][steph] who’s rapidly becoming a very good friend of mine asked me the other day, “Am I a project?” She had read [Being who I am][1], a post I wrote almost two years ago. I reread it the other day…
>What if - just what if - instead of always diverting this energy for ‘projects’ and expressing it in brief but intense bursts of fiery emotion, I learned to harness the energy in my daily life for the motivation and drive it’s always given me, and to use the energy as fuel for a more alive, more dynamic sort of relating to others?
Even then, tormented by my own intensity, I’d begun to see what crystallized for me during the time I’ve spent in Maui, and especially over a vegan vietnamese dinner in Paia… and which I wrote to the Zaadz team in my introductory email:
> I’ve learned over the past few years that my skills - professionally and personally - lie in integration and facilitation. I’ve always been fascinated by how to bring all sorts of disparate elements together, whether I was studying philosophy or religion, programming or usability, or just dealing with other people. I feel an incredibly strong pull to create an atmosphere in which incredible things can happen, for myself and for the people around me: growth, breakthrough, enlightenment.
Until recently, I’ve been assuming that the only correct path for me lay not in integration but in individuation: in finding out who I am _apart_ from my interactions with other people. Yet, though I have my own interests (hiking, Ruby on Rails, web development, writing, etc.), I find my true path through interaction, through support, through love.
So, dear friend, no, you’re not a project… quite the opposite: the intensity and intimacy with which I interact with close friends, something that scared me witless for many years (and because of that fear was unbearably intense when active and almost undetectable when I looked the other way), is the very core of who I am… in a sense a mirror, a magnifying glass. I find my happiness through pursuing my own life while helping you reach your own dreams.
I’m smiling because gradually since I moved to Maui and rapidly since I told Brian that I’m a facilitator - a being who helps other people reach their own greater selves, the storms of which I was so afraid have calmed - no less powerful but perhaps eased by the knowledge that I’ll no longer be resisting who I am.
And if all that’s a hokey bunch of New Age jumble, understand it this way: I love creating an environment that helps other people achieve their own highest goals. That’s where I’m happiest.
[b]:http://brian.zaadz.com/blog
[1]:http://blog.unquiet.net/archives/2004/04/23/being-who-i-am/
[steph]:http://stephalicio.us/
I guess I’m going to get my hands dirty and start using [Firefox][1] a little more, so I can post messages and blog entries on [Zaadz][2]… I’ve already got a bunch of friends there and I don’t want to seem rude by not replying.
But fear not, [Safari][3] users. I’m your champion there; I’ll make sure it all works out well in the end!
[1]: http://getfirefox.com/
[2]: http://zaadz.com/
[3]: http://www.apple.com/macosx/features/safari/
I just submitted the portfile for Lighttpd 1.4.9, so hopefully it will appear in the ports repository soon. mod_cml still doesn’t compile under DarwinPorts, unfortunately, so please don’t use the ‘cml’ variant (ie +mysql +ssl are fine, but not +cml) yet. I’ll work on it and update the port again if I get it compiling correctly.
I’m working hard to keep the updates closer to new releases.
**UPDATE**: It’s been committed!